BREAKING: Bravo’s Lisa Vanderpump Crushing on Raisin (Alien) on My Tomodachi Life Island

Rumors began flying last week after I saw Lisa Vanderpump’s Mii, which I made on my Tomodachi Life island, sitting on the beach with Raisin, an original Mii that I made who is an alien from The Sun.

For context, Raisin basically looks like a guy with a sun for a head. He is often seen “throwing a fit” in the fashion sense, wearing stylish cargo pants and a male manipulator sweater (Raisin identifies as nonbinary and uses he/they pronouns, so these clothing choices are an expression of irony.)

The two were seen discussing CEO shooters, a term which I taught them. Lisa Vanderpump’s cheeks began to emit a blush, and then when I clicked on her, I received a popup, one that said “What’s up with Lisa Vanderpump?” Then, a cutscene occurred wherein Lisa Vanderpump wondered aloud if she was “falling for Raisin.”

Scheana Shay, a former employee of Lisa Vanderpump and cast member on her show Vanderpump Rules, could not be reached for comment.

Many Bravo fans have speculated that this could hint at the breakdown of the relationship between Vanderpump and Shay, as Scheana’s Mii on my island used to date Raisin herself. Then, Alicia from Real Housewives of Rhode Island developed feelings for Scheana and asked her out. Then, to the utter shock and horror of many, Scheana said yes to Alicia, dumping Raisin like yesterday’s big smelly trash.

Meanwhile, Raisin has developed feelings for my childhood best friend Kendy, who recently broke up with Curb Your Enthusiasm’s Larry David after an unsuccessful marriage proposal.

Many are speculating that Raisin’s feelings for Kendy are going to actively conflict with Lisa Vanderpump’s “ready to risk it all” status, signaling a major chance at heartbreak for Vanderpump. We at Tease and Resist wish her the best of luck, while knowing that if she becomes depressed, it’s not that big of a deal because she will cheer up upon being fed her favorite food, creamy corn soup.